Tuesdays with Tammy: Not My Boy

I have a very sweet friend who is extremely funny and tells the best stories. She and I met through work and she invited me to try bellydancing when I was pregnant. I thought it would be a pretty easy workout (which it's not!) while I was pregnant. I am happy to be able to say we have been friends every since.
I have asked her to share a story twice a month that I can add to my blog. It's about her boys, and since I have two of my own boys I love to hear her stories and insights. I hope you like it!

Not My Boy….

I have three wonderful sons, now 22, 20, and 15 years old. My sons are all caring, wonderful, tenderhearted young men who will usually go out of their way to help others—even if they don’t really want to. I love them dearly and cherish the many lessons they have taught me over the years.

One lesson they taught me has held consistent through several situations as they have progressed through their various stages of development---they will always prove me wrong! (A trait I think they got from their father!) Just when I think I have them figured out, they will do or say something (usually very publicly) that will prove me wrong.

One spring day in my oldest son’s second year of life, we sat on the front step visiting with a neighbor and enjoying the gentle, earthy smells permeating the air after a warm rain. My sweet, gentle son squatted down on the concrete walkway attentively watching a small ant as it struggled with a heavy load. He loved bugs and would usually raptly watch them for many long minutes (a very long time for an active preschool boy to remain still!)

My neighbor eyed him cautiously and said, “He’s gonna kill that ant.”

“No,” I assured her, shaking my head reassuringly. “He wouldn’t hurt a fly!” (And he never had.)

At that very moment, my kind, loving, cherub-like child, stood up and STOMPED with all his might on that poor struggling ant, grinding it into the ground. I was mortified---not because he had killed the ant, but because he had done exactly the opposite of what I had expected him to do—and he had done it with witnesses! This little person, who I thought I had known better than I knew myself, did the unexpected!

This was but the first of many times that my sons would ‘prove me wrong’ over the years. Usually their proofs have come as wonderful surprises; sometimes they are difficult realizations. Sometimes they come with tears and struggles, but they always reinforce one thing----no matter how young or old they are, our children are NOT our carbon copies. They have minds of their own that they exercise from birth—making their own choices (both ‘right’ and ‘wrong’ in our eyes), and growing with what they learn from the choices they make. We, as parents, can only love, guide, hope, and pray—ultimately, the lives and choices of our children are in God’s hands. May He hold them safely always!

Tammy is a writer, storyteller, artist, crafter, and bellydancer who enjoys working with children of all ages. She lives in North Idaho with her wonderful husband, three sons, and a goofy dog. She teaches bellydancing, crochets, paints and sketches, and is trying to complete her first book when she isn’t at work or transporting her youngest son around town. She loves a good read, a good laugh, and life in general (especially when there are cookies involved!)

Cleaning and Organizing

I have always had a hard time cleaning and organizing. I feel good after it is done, but getting started is the main problem. I almost need a pep rally to get going!

On the other hand, I know if our house isn’t organized and clean we tend to spend more time doing things that aren’t as important as our job of caring for children and doing things that would glorify the Lord. So, I need to get on top of the mess---unclean dishes, dusty shelves, disastrous cupboards, dirty refrigerator, etc. I know there are many books out there with schedule on what to do each day, but I feel if I get behind that schedule I failed and it all goes out the window. In my world, one day I may not be able to do much due to my little boys needing me more on that particular day and another they may play quietly for hours.

I have decided that I will attempt to spend each week for at least the next 4 weeks working on a deep, in and out cleaning of a particular room. I will, of course, keep up with the normal chores such as washing clothes, washing dishes, etc. Just writing this makes me more excited and eager to get started. I will let you all know when I have completed the first area, which is the kitchen.

My kitchen is rather small for everything I would like to do with it. We just don’t have enough cabinet room for all the different “stuff” we have that we need occasionally such as vegetable platter, cake carrier, waffle maker, etc. I hope to find a way to organize that this week. On top of that, my preparation cart has become a “catch all” for junk mail, papers, computer accessories, etc. So, I am planning on taking care of that this week and be DONE with it so my preparation cart is a usable area, again.

Here are a few photos of my horrendous kitchen, at the moment. In a weeks time, I hope to put up pictures of a much nicer looking kitchen. I, also, hope it will look beautiful and clean, even where you don’t see (such as the refrigerator).

The preparation cart mess (left) and the microwave mess on (right).

The unorganized pots and pans cabinet.

Wish me luck in my endeavor...I shall need it!